February's Photo assignment:
It's time for another monthly photo assignments given by MeRa Koh. This months assignment was allot of fun, because I absolutely love DETAILS! I was to pick two different people. One would be young , the other old. The goal of this assignment was to walk into doing a photo shoot, aiming to capture several types of photos. One type is DETAILS. Before walking out, it would be my aim to know that I had captured the story of their life! It's in the DETAILS where a person's story is told. The different age groups will serve as a great platform for comparisons and contrast as I ask myself and my young and older subjects a series of questions along the way.
Part One: Here's my Young Luke!
Luke's Details: Here are his feet along side his big sisters; His new wooden truck that he got for valentines day; a well loved bear that's always near by; his beloved blue blanket upon which his treasured b-b collection is displayed; and the Lightning Cars pillow on which he dreams. This is the Story of Luke through images!
I thought there would be no need to interview my 4 year old boy as to his likes and dislikes. I'm his mamma, I know what he likes? Right...well I decided to go ahead and let him in on what I was trying to do. I explained that I wanted to take pictures that told the story of "Luke", about who he is, about what he loves. He was so excited and before I knew it he was literally pulling all his favorite things into a big pile. Let's just say it got messy real fast and mamma helped him narrow it down. It was a joy to discover the things in his life that he truly loves and appreciates.
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Part Two: My Older Neighbor Dorothy!
I must admit that it was far easier to approach my son with this creative endeavor of capturing details. I know him, I live with him, he is familiar to me. The second part of this assignment (capturing details of someone older) seamed far more daunting. I do not live near my parents, nor are any of my grandparents still living. I could have taken pictures of my husband, but truth be told he is younger than I. I was dragging my feet and the introvert in me had yet to be bold enough to ask someone. So in the mean time my darling 8 year old daughter was out playing in our neighborhood. Makayla comes in and says, " Hey mom - Dorothy, wants you to come over and have coffee with her tomorrow! Oh and I told her you where free, cause both Luke and I are at school!" Gotta love a daughter who takes it upon herself to set up her mothers social calender! Makayla knew nothing of the project I was working on, mind you.
Makayla and Dorothy have had the the sweetest relationship ever since Dorthy moved into our neighborhood about a year ago. The two of them just clicked. Makayla has gone to visit Dorothy on numerous occasions and often brings her little brother, Luke in tow. Every time she comes home after a visit she would say, "Mommy, I think Dorothy is lonely." Ugh- Pulling at my heart strings, I have waved, smiled, had short conversations of small talk at the mail box and have prayed for Dorothy. Well-Absolutely nothing can compare to spending time with someone face to face and eye to eye over a cup of coffee! I arrived at Dorothy's about 8:45 am and stayed till almost 11:00. In the back of my mind I thought maybe, just maybe, Dorothy would be up for me taking some detail pictures of her life, so I popped my camera in my purse. Let's just say she was more than gracious.
Before I had even mentioned my little photography project, Dorothy was busy telling me all about herself, her life, her travels and her late husband whom she dearly missed. She gave me a tour of her home and showed me all kinds of amazing pieces of art that she has collected over the years. I was floored at how much of herself she was offering...she was without a doubt sharing the details of her life with me. Ahhh- What a perfect sag-way... This was exactly what my assignment was about! Dorothy was gracious to let me tell a slice of her story through image. It was eye opening to see that it's sometimes in the every day things that often hold the most significance in our lives.
Dorothy's Details: An Indian beaded pen was one of many treasured art pieces she has. Her husband was Indian and they had spent much of their 48 years of marriage working on reservations, before he died just a year and a half ago. We sat at her dinning room table with coffee in hand, a bowl of treats and sugar near by. We visited and got to know one another. The pink and white quilt is an Indian Star quilt made from a friend on one of the reservations. The picture behind Dorothy is one of her many Bev Doo Little prints that add such warmth and intrigue to her home. She shared albums of when she was young and without a doubt I could see the loneliness in her stunning blue eyes.
I am already looking forward to my next coffee date with sweet Dorothy!
As I approached this assignment I kept having a sense of disconnectedness with myself, an anxiety of sorts. I asked myself where is it that I feel the most at peace, whole and inspired?
The River! That’s it; I will go to the river. The very spot that has brought me much joy, comfort and inspiration over this past year. This is a place I retreat to often. It is where I stop to stretch after a long walk with my dog, it is where we go as a family to play, swim and hunt for treasures. It is where my son and I look for fish, crawdads and anything creepy and crawly. It is where my daughter and I pretend we are having a spa day as we sit by the waterfall and cover our fingers and toes in mud. This is also a place I have brought treasured friends from out of town to see the sites of this small town. It is a special place my husband and I walk too, to sit together and talk about our day and share our hearts.
Besides being a place of restoration and play it has also become a favorite spot for photo shoots that never fail to ignite the artists within. It is where I retreat- to think, pray, hope, dream and listen to all God would say. I love the stillness of the sky against the contrast of the rushing waters. I love studying the roots of the enormous trees that stand so strong and drink from the waters edge. In this image I share with you, I see myself as a small sapling, ready for nourishment and growth.
"He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither." Psalms 1:3
After a year of many different kinds of losses, conflict, confusion, physical pain, exhaustion, disappointments and frustrations. There have been deep concerns, fears and matters of faith to contend with. I found myself time and time again on the banks of this river longing to poor out my heart to God and be filled and strengthened by His truth and living waters. I see concern and the etching of age on my face and I sense a longing for deeper understanding and maturity. I also see a determination of spirit and a women who is intimately aware of her need for God. I feel lurking danger in the waters behind me yet a peace that is still.
As you can probably already tell from the words I have expressed about my self portrait. I have been feeling a bit fragmented, broken and disconnected. Things such as a move away from friends and family three years ago, watching my parents struggle after loosing their home to a house fire, nearly loosing my dad last year, watching my mom suffer, saying so-long to my sister as she moved across the country, attending more funerals than weddings, dealing with chronic back pain and last but not least grieving the loss of my beloved DSLR Canon Camera that has been a means of such beauty, inspiration and healing in my life- To say the least... it has been a difficult season. The broken glass reflected to me all the shattered and fragmented pieces of my life over these past few years. It is scattered- just as my thoughts and heart have been. It is broken- just as my body has felt. It is fragmented-just as many relationships in my life have been. The hope lies in it's brilliant color. The shiny blue against the contrast of rocks and dieing leaves reflected something entirely different to me. The bright blue reminded me of all the blessings in my life that have come out of hardship. In this season of confusion and high emotion there has been deep bold beauty that has shown forth from the pain and struggle. That is the way life is...in our brokenness God is allowed to shine forth his plan and blessings. It is at the point of brokenness and total surrender that we finally find hope and healing.
"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you walk throough the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." Isaiah 43:2
Depending on the season of life, I think a self portrait can change drastically over time. I look forward to capturing my metamorphosis in the months to come…This is my goal: To always be moving forward one day at a time to grow, change and mature from the inside out. May the reflection others see in me always bring Glory to the Lord. Blessings to you as you SOAR toward all that God has for you in your own life.
There are those in this world that have the uncanny ability to dream and dream big. True visionaries that don't just have a dream for themselves, but they are gifted in their ability to listen to God, share the vision, encourage others toward something beautiful in their own lives and inspire everyone they come in contact with. I have been incredibly blessed over the years to know two people that have graciously and constantly poured out their hearts to countless others. I have been one of many that has been given an incredible opportunity to learn, grow and begin to SOAR in my passion for photography because of these two amazing people. This is a little "Thank You" video that was put together for two people such as this. MeRa Koh and her husband Brian...We Love you and We Thank You!
BEFORE YOU PRESS PLAY ON THE VIDEO BELOW- BE SURE TO SCROLL DOWN TO THE BOTTOM SIDE BAR AND PRESS PAUSE ON THE BLOG PLAY LIST...other wise you will have two songs playing at once. ; )
The learning curve is endless. Now that I have a basic sence of my camera and its and my ability. It's now the challenge of venturing into the territory of marketing...there are so many ideas running through my head at any given time. I love that the creative juices are flowing and Spring is on it's way. I have built a solid photography portfolio over the past few years and now speading the word in a new community will be fun. I have spent time learning about Blogging, creating new business cards, researching web desighners, using Pictage and editing in Photoshop. At times all of this makes my head spin. Perhaps it's not all the research or energy it takes that makes my head spin rather the time of life I am in. I am trying desperatly to balance family, photography and contsant physical pain caused by Aostio Arthritis. I more often than not find it difficult to do any of my basic roles in life with much ease. I am stubburn to keep, keeping on , I love being a stay at home mom but at the same time I have a dream of contributing to my families finances as well as flourish and challenge myself in creative outlets and endevours. Just this week I had one of those days that really made me question if this was the right timing for all this? The photo shoots themselves are my passion. It's all the behind the scene efforts at home on a computer that is in the middle of our central living courters. There is no place to hide for this mama....It is difficult and frustrating to be constantly interuppted with needs of a 2 year old and a busy 6 year old who does not know how to entertain herself. Winter is the worst, "Mama, look at me? Mama, Come here! Mama, I need help! Mama, I'm hungry! Mama, can we watch a little show? Mama, mama mama!!!I really have to be disiplined to walk away from the computer and focus on my family. These precious lives that God has given me to love and raise are truelly my first priority. Finding those quite blocks of time have become the late evening hours leading to midnight. I pray I will learn to balance building this dream into reality as I also meet the needs of my family. I daily seek wisdom from other women who are several steps further in the process of motherhood and who are now running a thriving photography business as a side job. I find encouragement in their success stories and so apriciate when they too share their struggles. I don't want to give up on a passion, I just need to pace myself one day at a time. My biggest fear is that I would look back and feel like I neglected my kids for the sake of my own endevours and need for creative outlet. What seams to drive me is that I know that in having an outlet of my own outside of the role of wife and mother. I am much happier and full of life and joy than I would be other wise. So I have come to the conclusion that this "building a Business" is a journey, as with all of life it has it's peeks and valleys. I have come to appriciate the beauty of darkness, in that it makes the light that much brighter. May photography be a means to shine light upon dark places to expose the beauty within others and within myself. Let there be LIGHT and LIFE in LIFESONG!
